Seller Concessions, can they be a deal killer?

Lee’s notes: I get several publications which have questions and answers regarding real estate transactions. So occasionally I will add them here so you folks can read them. The below is from advice expert Edith Lank. The publication doesnt give her qualifications, but her answers are generally pretty spot on.

The only thing I take issue with below is the familial status response she gives.. It is illegal to sell a home based off of a persons familial status(whether they have children or not).  I think Edith is saying the sellers like the idea that the “prefered” buyers have kids. Which while not a prejudice against people who have children, is a big no no for families without children..  If that makes sense…

Dear Mrs. Lank:
We just lost out on a house we really loved to another offer.
We offered $2,000 above the asking price and asked for 4 percent
concessions. The other people did not ask for concessions
in their offer. We don’t know how much they offered. Our
Realtor told us they preferred the other offer because no concessions
were asked for.
We asked for the concessions so the seller would help us
with closing costs. We offered something over the asking price
to hopefully offset that. We are very disappointed about the
way things turned out, and I was wondering if you could give
my husband and I any advice for future offers. Is it common for
concessions to be “deal breakers”? We could really use them to
help with closing costs, but we don’t want to repeat this same
scenario in the future, if possible. I know each situation is
unique, but, in your opinion, are we better off not asking for
the concessions?
– G.K.
The extra $2,000 you offered probably didn’t come close to
making up for the 4 percent of purchase price you asked the
seller to pay toward your closing costs. So yours wasn’t really a
full-price offer.
Nobody can predict what’s important to a particular seller. They
might have preferred the other buyers’ proposed closing date or a
higher purchase price. They might have run into owners who saw
the buyers’ children on the swings in the backyard and enjoyed
the idea of that particular family living in their beloved family
homestead. Until they’ve signed an acceptance, sellers are free to
deal with any offer they choose. The only limitation is that they
cannot base their decision on potential buyers’ race, religion,
handicap, children, or other class protected by fair housing laws.
If you’re short of cash and can’t buy without the sellers paying
some of your closing costs, you’ll have to continue making
offers on that basis. Some sellers do accept such offers, and

some mortgage plans allow them.